From Self-Doubt to Self-Confidence: The Journey of Embracing Your Inner Strength

Have you ever felt like you just couldn’t quite get a grip on life? Like you were drifting, going with the flow, but without any real direction or purpose? Yeah. I’ve been there. I used to just exist, rather than truly live. I had all these ideas of who I should be and what my life should look like, but I never stopped to figure out who I actually was.

I kept trying to find happiness in relationships, but I lacked confidence and always ended up starting over—feeling more broken each time. To fill the void, I looked for validation from other people. Spoiler alert: it didn’t work.

It wasn’t until I started therapy and dove into self-help books that I realized something big: the only person who can truly fill my cup… is me.

I began to forgive myself for past mistakes. I learned that growth comes from experience—and that messing up is part of the package. It’s okay to not be perfect. Actually, it’s essential. The people who constantly put you down or hold you back? You don’t have to keep them around. Protecting your peace is not selfish; it’s self-respect.

One of the hardest lessons I ever learned was that sometimes, even the people we were once closest to can become a source of deep pain. I had a sister I was incredibly close with. But over time, her unhealed hurt turned into bitterness, and that bitterness became something she took out on me. I kept trying to rekindle what we had, and she would slap me in the face with it—emotionally, not physically—but just as painful. I tried to hold space, to be there, but I ended up carrying scars from the way she treated me. It took years to unravel that damage.

Eventually, I made the difficult decision to go no contact. And while it wasn’t easy, it was necessary. I had to choose my own healing. And in doing so, I finally began to reclaim my peace. Some relationships can’t come with us into our next chapter—and that’s okay.

Your worth? Your value? It comes from within. Believing in yourself and your abilities is everything. So let’s shake off the negativity and embrace what’s ahead.

There’s a song that really hit home for me: “I’m Moving On” by Rascal Flatts. It echoed my own struggle and journey toward self-acceptance. It’s about facing your ghosts and demons, finding strength in your weak moments, and moving forward after being stuck in the past. That song was a turning point. I realized I had faced my demons. I was finally at peace with myself.

I stopped chasing validation. I started being kind to myself. And I finally understood: We have the power to give our lives value. We don’t need to measure ourselves at all.

Valuing ourselves for who we are allows us to live with purpose—and to reach our full potential on our terms. Self-acceptance means embracing the ugly stuff without shame. We all make mistakes. What matters is that we learn from them. As Maya Angelou said, “Do the best you can until you know better. Then when you know better, do better.” We also need to offer that same grace to others. Being kind is always a priority—it can save relationships. And sometimes, we have to get uncomfortable, have hard conversations, and be willing to sit in that discomfort to grow. So yeah, tune out the noise. Especially that inner critic. (Mine had a megaphone.) A therapist once told me I was brutal with myself. She was right. But I’ve learned to go easier.

I hope my story resonates with you—especially if you’re going through something similar. I hope it reminds you to be kind to yourself. To give yourself grace. And to believe that forward motion, even if it’s slow, is still progress.

Making my well-being a priority and focusing on my own happiness isn’t self-centered. It’s self-care. That’s where boundaries come in. I’m not always going to make everyone happy—and I’m finally okay with that.

A business coach once asked me, “Would you rather be liked or respected?” Oof. That one made me stop and think. While we can’t control how others perceive us, we can earn respect. And it starts by respecting ourselves: our time, our energy, our boundaries.

Little by little, I began showing up for myself. I spoke up more. I trusted my instincts. I started giving myself actual compliments—out loud. Because guess what? Your subconscious is listening. The way we talk to ourselves matters.

It wasn’t always easy. But it was the best decision I ever made.

Now? I’m more confident. More self-assured. More content than I’ve ever been. And every single day, I make the conscious choice to show up. Like Mel Robbins says: “No one is coming to save you.”

So if you’re feeling lost or uncertain, here’s my gentle nudge: show up for yourself. Focus on your dreams, your voice, your growth. Be kind to yourself. Keep learning. Keep going. And if you know me, you’ve heard me say this a million times… but I’ll say it again:

You’re worth it.

Thanks for reading, Chrysti
(PS: If you haven’t heard “I’m Moving On” by Rascal Flatts, go listen. Tissues optional but recommended.)

The photo in this article is from a moment before I took back my life. When I see it today, so many years later and my life has blossomed in so many ways. I hadn’t even gotten my camera yet! I imagine tapping on that woman’s (my) shoulder in the photo and having her turn around to see me NOW! That feels amazing. And I did this. I changed my life for the better. You can too!

Shine bright. Don’t be afraid of your own light—and never, ever dim your light in fear.